How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
