yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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