I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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