I bet he comes in French.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
