I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
