come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
