Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
