I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize