Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He better not be in your backpack
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
