i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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