My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Hippo gnu deer
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
