Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
