Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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