I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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