I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
smell my finger.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
he just fucked me for my cheese.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
