Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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