He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
