Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
