After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My dad is sitting where you rode me
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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