every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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