i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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