There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
