scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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