Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
