so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
