Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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