U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
This girl is more easily done than said...
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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