I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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