i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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