jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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