i was born a porn star she said
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I believe in your delicious
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
