is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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