So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
