I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
