dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
