My room smells like vodka and shame
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
