so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
