Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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