I can't watch pbs sober anymore
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
