Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
