Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
