we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I have feelings that need drinking.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
