It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I have demons in me.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Church boner. Awkwardddd
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize
