He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You smell like stripper and shame
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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