mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
this will be a night to untag.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
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