My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Randomize
