I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
