There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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