This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Randomize