I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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